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BORED BY BUSH BAMBOOZLES? Subscribe to "Inside Bush Watch" and you'll get the stuff we don't report at "Bush Watch." Breaking news and broken promises. Quotes, jokes, blokes, and tokes. For you? Free. Such a deal! (Click on "JoinList") OUR TOP TEN VS. BUSH'S OUR TOP 10 REASONS BUSH LOST DEBATE 3. --Bush Watch, 10/20/00 10. He said his Texas record only was available on tape or cd. 9. He claimed he never touched alcohol or drugs during his entire term as Prime Minister of Mexico. 8. He bragged he was governor of "the greatest state in the union," when he's actually the Governor of Texas. 7. He jokingly told the audience, "I'm the droid you're looking for." 6. He admitted that he laughed all the way through "Silence of the Lambs." 5. He told Jim Lehrer that the voices in his head were so loud he couldn't hear the questions. 4. He promised to bring "dingity" to the White House. 3. He said he was pretty sure that Al Gore wasn't old enough to have freed the slaves. 2. He claimed that thick smog in Houston is an important, edible source of vitamins and minerals. 1. He said to one Town Hall Debate questioner, "I can't help it -- my eyes are trapped in the gravitational field of your breasts!!" --Edited by Politex, shamelessly cribbed and revised from TopFive.com. Actually, two of them were totally mine, the ones you thought were really funny. --Politex TOP TEN THINGS BUSH WOULD WANT TO DO IN WHITE HOUSE --David Letterman Show, 10/19/00 10.To save taxpayer dollars, calls to winning sports teams will be collect. 9.New rule at cabinet meetings -- you can't talk until you ride the mechanical bull. 8.Goodbye boring presidential radio address -- hello "Dick Cheney Spins The Hits of the 80's, 90's and Today." 7.Make sure the White House library has lots of books with big print and pictures. 6.Just for fun, issue executive order commanding my brother Jeb to wash my car. 5.First day in office my mother's face goes up on Mount Rushmore. 4.Look into hiring a security guard for our nuclear secrets. 3.Will not get sick on Japanese leaders like other President Bushes I know. 2.Give Oval Office one heck of a scrubbing. 1.Tax relief for all Americans -- except smart aleck talk show hosts. --Authorship Unknown. (Who Would Want to Admit to It? --Politex) for previous bush headlines, go to...